GUEST BLOG BY Jackie Simmons | you can’t tell by looking

Content Warning: Suicide

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This guest post was written by Jackie Simmons, Founder of the Suicide Prevention Society. She is an international speaker, the host of The Suicide Prevention Show, the co-founder of the Teen Suicide Prevention Society, and the author/compiler of the book: Make It A Great Day: The Choice Is Yours and author of The “Why Not?” Workbook: Breaking the Silence on Teen Suicide.

“We imagine a world where suicide is a thing of the past.”

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You Can’t Tell By Looking

You hadn't laughed so hard in years.

She was the life of the party last night.

A mutual friend calls.

You smile as you answer until you hear her tears.

“She's gone” she cries.

What?

“She's gone! After the party she went home and . . .

”At the funeral all you heard was: "How could this have happened? We didn't see it coming"

We've learned you can't tell by looking.

That's why it's important to talk about suicide now, before you think they need it.

Get your free guide to the talk that saves lives.

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Watch Jackie Simmons, TEDx Speaker’s, “Have the Talk to Stop Teen Suicide” talk.

"In the next 24 hours, over 3,000 American teens will attempt to take their own lives. According to the Center for Disease Control, 25% of American young adults are struggling with suicidal thoughts. When you watch Have “The Talk” to Stop Teen Suicide, you’ll enter into a world of deadly silences and bone-chilling revelations. Along the way, Have The Talk to Stop Teen Suicide delivers the clues and keys you need to break the deadly silences and prevent the guilt-nightmare that haunts parents, classmates, teachers, and friends following a suicide attempt. Have “The Talk” to Stop Teen Suicide includes the purely preventative, science-based, 4-step script for The Talk About Suicide. It’s a powerful model for communicating on a topic no one wants to talk about. Jackie believes having The Talk About Suicide just might save your child’s life. Jackie Simmons, - Jackie@TeenSuicidePreventionSociety.org – is an international speaker, the host of The Suicide Prevention Show, the co-founder of the Teen Suicide Prevention Society, and the author/compiler of the book: Make It A Great Day: The Choice Is Yours and author of The “Why Not?” Workbook: Breaking the Silence on Teen Suicide. Jackie believes that teen suicides can be prevented. This is truly a case where an ounce of prevention is worth way more than a pound of cure. "

STUDENT MENTAL HEALTH: FROM REACTION TO PREVENTION

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Introduction

In today’s fast-paced educational settings, educators face a growing challenge that goes beyond mere academics: the mental and emotional well-being of their students. Classrooms are becoming microcosms of the larger world, reflecting increased anxiety, stress, and isolation among students. As a lifelong educator with experience from kindergarten through post-secondary, and entrepreneur whose focus is on emotional health for children and youth, I have witnessed firsthand the urgent need for proactive strategies in emotional education. The children's book series, "The Power of Thought," is designed to address these very challenges, providing educators and students alike with the tools they need to manage emotions effectively.

The Struggles in the Classroom

Educators are increasingly observing students who either react explosively to stress or withdraw entirely, demonstrating behaviors that disrupt their learning and social interactions. But why do these emotional outbursts or retreats happen?

1. Overwhelming Stress and Pressure: Students today face immense pressure to perform academically and socially, which can lead to stress overload. This is often compounded by a lack of adequate coping mechanisms.

2. Lack of Emotional Vocabulary: Many students struggle because they do not have the language to express what they are feeling. Without the words to describe their emotions, these feelings can manifest as behavioral issues.

3. Their Toolbox is Empty: When students can identify and understand the reason for their feelings, they need to know what to about it. There are many proven strategies they have not learned and practiced, giving them coping mechanisms.

4. Isolation and Loneliness: In an age where digital interactions often replace face-to-face connections, feelings of isolation are prevalent. This can be particularly acute in environments where students feel they do not belong or are not understood.

Are Educators Equipped with Proactive Emotional Resources?

Despite the availability of educational resources aimed at emotional regulation, many educators have not integrated these tools into their daily teaching practices. The reasons vary, including:

• Curriculum Constraints: Teachers often face strict curriculum guidelines that prioritize academic results over emotional learning, or the curriculum they are bound to does not include well-being at all.

• Training and Support: Implementing programs on emotional well-being requires proper training and ongoing support, which may not always be readily available.

• Lack of Awareness: Some educators may not be fully aware of the resources available or understand how they can be woven into the curriculum.

The Role of "The Power of Thought" in Transforming Well-Being

Books are not only used in primary classrooms to ignite a love of reading but also for educational purposes. "The Power of Thought" series has been developed in consultation with educators, parents and clinicians. It offers a proactive approach for children to learn about emotional regulation from a young age. Each book takes readers into a situation they can relate to, where characters glow in the colour of their feelings. A proven strategy that students can use for life is then taught in a fun way. Here’s how this resource can make a difference:

• Supports Educators: It equips teachers with ready-to-use materials that can be easily integrated into their teaching schedule, helping them address emotional learning without overwhelming their existing workload. Staff and students have a tool box of strategies to use throughout the year.

• Empowers Students: Armed with better emotional coping strategies, students can handle stress more effectively, leading to improved academic performance and healthier social interactions.

• Creates Inclusive Environments: By teaching all children about emotional regulation, the series promotes an inclusive environment where every student feels valued and understood.

• Builds Emotional Intelligence: The series provides children with relatable stories and practical tools that help them identify and manage their emotions, fostering emotional intelligence that is critical in today’s world.

Invitation to Explore Further

Educators who are keen to see a transformation in their classrooms where students are equipped not just academically but also emotionally are invited to explore how "The Power of Thought" can be part of their teaching toolkit. Educational guides, think-tank pages and puppets accompany the books.

Together, we can equip our future generations with the resilience and emotional acuity needed to thrive in a complex world.

A version of this blog is posted on VoiceAmerica Blog.

GUEST BLOG BY ANGELA LEGH | Unraveling the Epidemic of Loneliness: A Call for Real Connection in a Digital Age

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This guest post was written by Angela Legh for the NYC Independent. Angela is an International Freelance Author, an International Bestselling Author, and Motivational Speaker.

In a recent report by the US Surgeon General, recommendations were laid out for parents and caregivers, highlighting the importance of fostering healthy social connections for young people. While these suggestions are undoubtedly valuable, they only scratch the surface of a much deeper problem.

The Challenges Presented by Social Media

The report issued by the Surgeon General fails to address the insidious nature of social media, where comparison and validation-seeking behaviors run rampant. It’s not enough to simply delay the age at which children join these platforms or monitor their screen time. We must equip them with the critical thinking skills to navigate the digital landscape responsibly and discern between meaningful connections and superficial interactions.

We must acknowledge the detrimental impact of social media and the lack of emotional literacy among today’s youth. Loneliness can stem from the craving for external validation, where one’s sense of self-worth depends on how others perceive them. This notion manifests in believing that “I am good only if you see me as good.”

If a teen’s need for validation goes unfulfilled, the teen may experience heightened feelings of inadequacy, loneliness, and even depression. This reliance on external validation from social media can perpetuate a cycle of seeking approval from others rather than fostering genuine self-confidence and inner validation. As a result, the teen may struggle to develop authentic relationships and find themselves increasingly disconnected from their true selves and those around them.

Seeking external validation can signify a disconnection from oneself that can trace its roots back to unresolved childhood wounds. Childhood trauma, whether it’s emotional neglect, physical abuse, or other forms of adversity, can leave deep emotional scars that linger into adulthood. Feelings of shame, guilt, and inadequacy stemming from these experiences can be overwhelming and difficult to face head-on, so we often bury them deep within our subconscious.

Individuals may seek validation and approval from external sources to numb the pain of these buried emotions. Alternatively, they may seek relief through numbing behaviors, such as alcohol, drugs, or self-harming behavior. Whether it’s through seeking validation from others or engaging in self-destructive behaviors, the person who chooses these coping mechanisms is carving a path toward increased emotional pain. If you notice any of these behaviors in your teens, it’s crucial to seek assistance from a professional.

The temporary relief gained from external validation only perpetuates the cycle of disconnection from oneself. True healing can only begin when we dare confront and acknowledge the buried emotions from our past. Through therapy, self-reflection, and compassionate self-care, we can gradually unearth these suppressed feelings and begin the process of healing and self-reconnection.

By facing our childhood wounds with courage and compassion, we can reclaim our sense of self-worth and break free from the cycle of seeking external validation. Doing so paves the way for genuine self-acceptance, inner peace, and authentic connection with ourselves and others.

Building Meaningful Connections Offline

Investing in solid relationships and encouraging offline, real-world interactions are crucial to combating loneliness. Volunteering to help others can forge deep, compassionate relationships as individuals come together to impact their communities. A few things can lift one’s spirit, such as volunteering to assist those in need. Whether it’s lending a hand at a local soup kitchen or participating in community service projects, the act of giving back fosters bonds based on shared values and a sense of purpose.

Similarly, joining clubs and sports teams offers opportunities to build bonding relationships. Whether it’s a book club, a hobby group, or a sports team, being part of a collective pursuit fosters a sense of belonging and camaraderie, where shared experiences and challenges deepen connections among members. Through these activities, individuals combat loneliness and cultivate a sense of belonging and interconnectedness within their communities, contributing to the collective well-being of society as a whole.

Another avenue for teens to establish offline connections is attending local events or workshops tailored to their interests, such as art exhibitions, music concerts, or educational seminars. If necessary, parents can collaborate with other parents to organize transportation and guidance for their teens. These gatherings provide opportunities for teens to mingle with others who share their interests, facilitating connections beyond their existing social circles.

Listening Compassionately

Most importantly, we must listen to the voices of our youth. Let us validate their experiences of loneliness and isolation without dismissing them as trivial or fleeting. Let us offer them the support and resources they need to navigate these turbulent waters and emerge stronger, more resilient, and truly connected to themselves and others.

Ultimately, it’s about more than the number of friends or followers we have online but the depth and authenticity of the connections we cultivate offline. The quality of life is measured by the quality of the relationships we sustain.

It’s time for parents to reflect on the impact of their own social media usage and the importance of fostering real-world connections and social interactions as a model of behavior for their children. My heart sinks when I see a parent on a playground, glued to their phone, scrolling through Instagram while the child begs for attention. At that moment, the parent misses out on genuine interaction, opting for the illusion of connection through social media. Take a moment to observe how parents in your community engage with social media. Let’s unite to fight against teenage loneliness, working toward a future where every adolescent feels acknowledged, heard, and valued for their individuality and worth.

Angela Legh is passionate about promoting emotional intelligence with her book series The Bella Santini Chronicles.While we live in a hyper-connected world, there is a paradox in how loneliness continues to plague the lives of teenagers. Despite the apparent plethora of online friends and social media followers, many adolescents are trapped in a web of isolation, yearning for genuine human connection.

Booth or Bust: Navigating the Conference Circuit as an Entrepreneur/Author

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Introduction

In the world of entrepreneurship and authorship, one of the most challenging decisions involves whether or not to participate in large scale conferences or expos. Whether it's weighing the financial investment against potential gains or considering the impact on visibility and networking, entrepreneurs and authors often find themselves at a crossroads. Amber Raymond (Social Worker, my co-author, and niece) and I have been honoured to have a booth at the American Library Association Conference (in Chicago), as well as Reading for the Love of It (In Toronto) in the past year. We made the decision to be involved in each of these, as well as future ones, by taking many factors into consideration.

Is the Investment Worth It?

Conferences come with a hefty price tag, often ranging from hundreds to thousands of dollars for attendance, booth space, accommodations, travel or workshop presenting opportunities. As Canadians, we also have to take into the account the currency exchange rate, which can increase the cost by over 40%. Each time we consider a submission, we have to carefully evaluate the return on investment (ROI) in terms of book sales, brand exposure, and networking potential. More importantly for us is our never-ending question, “How many homes or classrooms could be impacted in a positive way as a result of the connections, sales or impromptu conversations we will have?” That’s a tough one and very unpredictable.

Pros of Visibility: Amplifying Reach and Influence

Visibility is crucial for any entrepreneur or author looking to make an impact. Conferences offer a platform to showcase products, share expertise, and connect with a targeted audience. For "The Power of Thought" series and the related products we offer, being visible at conferences provides an opportunity to reach parents, educators, and influencers who can amplify the message of having a proactive lens when it comes to emotional regulation and management for children. Through our presentations, interactive booths, and networking sessions, we establish credibility and cultivate relationships that extend far beyond the event.

Cons of Taking the Risk: Navigating Uncertainty

However, the decision to participate in conferences is not without its risks. Beyond the financial investment, there's the uncertainty of ROI. Will the cost of attendance translate into significant book sales? Will the audience resonate with the message of "The Power of Thought" series? Additionally, there's the cost of time when we have to take time off of work and away from our families. Can our resources be allocated elsewhere, such as digital marketing campaigns or direct outreach to influencers?

Maximizing Impact

To mitigate the risks and optimize outcomes, let’s approach conference participation strategically. This involves thorough research to identify events aligned with the target audience and theme of "The Power of Thought" series. For us, that includes parents, educators and libraries, which has countless opportunities.

Often, conversations with fellow entrepreneurs who also believe in collaboration over competition open doors. We have joined forces with like-minded people with visions that align with ours in developing submissions as co-presenters. For example, working with Margaret Boersma not only helped us both see things from varying points of view, we dove into current research and developed our plan while pushing each other to think outside of the box. Not only does this collaboration raise the bar, it also cuts the financial cost in half.

Which conferences have served them well? Negotiating favorable terms for booth space or speaking slots, where possible, helps maximize visibility while minimizing costs. Sometimes there are options on the size of the booth and if we are also workshop presenters, that most definitely has its perks with a fully engaged audience who chose us because they have a connection. Leveraging social media and pre-conference promotion can drum up anticipation and attract attendees to the booth or presentation.

The Ripple Effect of Word of Mouth

Ultimately, the goal of conference participation extends beyond immediate book sales. It's about planting seeds for long-term success through word of mouth and endorsements. By forging genuine connections with attendees, speakers, and fellow exhibitors, entrepreneurs can spark conversations that ripple through networks, leading to recommendations, reviews, and partnerships that amplify the reach and impact of "The Power of Thought" series. From our experiences, word of mouth and the feedback we receive about the impact our books is having, liftsand empowers us.

Conclusion: Balancing Risk and Reward

The decision to participate in conferences requires careful deliberation and strategic planning. While the financial cost may seem daunting, the potential benefits in terms of visibility, networking, and word of mouth can outweigh the risks. By approaching conference participation strategically and focusing on customers as well as forging relationship with fellow entrepreneurs, we can elevate our brands, amplify our message, and ultimately, have more impact on families and educators as our books/products/resources find themselves in classrooms, libraries and homes.

Every decision shapes the narrative of success. With a clear understanding of the conference conundrum and a willingness to embrace calculated risks, entrepreneurs can navigate this terrain with confidence and conviction, reaching new heights of impact and influence. For us, the risk has most definitely been worth it! And who knows, maybe a publishing or educational company will want to make us an offer to scoop up our book series, making it more universally accessible through their global reach. Anything is possible.

The Crucial Role of Student Well-Being Embedded in Curriculum

This blog was posted on VoiceAmerica 9 January 2024

Introduction
The focus has been shifting beyond traditional academic achievements to encompass the holistic development of students, with decades of research in support. There are countless renowned thought leaders like Simon Sinek and Jon Kabat-Zin as well as organizations such as CASEL (Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning), Children’s Healthcare Canada, the Centre for Addictions and Mental Health… the list is expansive. Each has been instrumental in emphasizing the importance of emotional literacy in education and providing resources.

Change Agents
Simon Sinek, a renowned author and motivational speaker, stresses the significance of emotional intelligence in fostering success and well-being. In the context of education, Sinek advocates for an approach that goes beyond imparting knowledge and focuses on nurturing essential life skills. According to Sinek, emotionally literate individuals are better equipped to navigate challenges, build meaningful relationships, and contribute positively to society.

CASEL, a leading organization in the field of education, has developed a comprehensive framework for Social and Emotional Learning (SEL). The CASEL framework outlines five core competencies – self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, relationship skills, and responsible decision-making. These competencies form the backbone of emotional literacy, providing a structured approach for educators to integrate SEL into their teaching practices.

Children’s Healthcare Canada recognizes the profound impact of emotional well-being on a child’s overall health. By acknowledging the connection between emotional and physical health, this organization underscores the importance of a holistic approach to education. Emotional literacy, as advocated by Children’s Healthcare Canada, becomes a preventive measure, equipping students with tools to navigate stressors and challenges early on.

Three Key Reasons Why Being Proactive for Well-Being in Schools is Critical
⦁ Research indicates that students with strong emotional literacy skills often perform better academically. The ability to manage emotions contributes to improved focus, resilience, and a positive attitude towards learning.
⦁ Emotional literacy fosters the development of strong interpersonal skills. Students who understand and manage their emotions are better equipped to build positive relationships with peers and teachers, creating a conducive learning environment.
⦁ Early intervention through emotional literacy programs can serve as a preventive measure against mental health challenges. Providing students with the tools to understand and cope with their emotions can mitigate the risk of emotional struggles later in life.

Positive Movement
Some countries have well-being embedded in education from early years or in childcare settings. When children learn these strategies at a young age, they have them for life. School Mental Health Ontario offers lessons from K-12 which are secular and exceptional, and it is currently an optional resource. Recent changes have added components of well-being to the grade 7 and 8 curriculum. Boards of Education have provided teacher training with programs through Mindful Schools or offered consultant support, but again, these are typically optional.

Conclusion
Incorporating emotional literacy into education is not just a trend; it’s a necessity. By prioritizing student emotional well-being, educators lay the foundation for a resilient, empathetic, and successful future generation.
Imagine the synergy we could create if every educator not only had the strategies to teach their students, but to embrace the tools themselves. It’s long overdue.
I would love to hear from you as I gather information globally. What is happening in your school, in your school district to support student and staff well-being? Reach out to me through email at lynn@lynnmclaughlin.com or through my website https://lynnmclaughlin.com.

References
ResearchGate (2022) Jon Kabat-Zinn’s research while affiliated with University of Massachusetts Medical School and other places
Retrieved from URL https://www.researchgate.net/scientific-contributions/Jon-Kabat-Zinn-2065860115

Simon Siniuk (2024) The Optimism Company
Retrieved from URL https://simonsinek.com

CASEL (2024) Advancing Social and Emotional Learning
Retrieved from URL https://casel.org

Children’s Health Care Canada (2022)
Retrieved from URL https://www.childrenshealthcarecanada.ca/en/child-health-advocacy/child-and-youth-mental-health.aspx

School Mental Health Ontario (2024)
Retrieved from URL https://smho-smso.ca