GUEST BLOG BY Jackie Simmons | you can’t tell by looking

Content Warning: Suicide

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This guest post was written by Jackie Simmons, Founder of the Suicide Prevention Society. She is an international speaker, the host of The Suicide Prevention Show, the co-founder of the Teen Suicide Prevention Society, and the author/compiler of the book: Make It A Great Day: The Choice Is Yours and author of The “Why Not?” Workbook: Breaking the Silence on Teen Suicide.

“We imagine a world where suicide is a thing of the past.”

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You Can’t Tell By Looking

You hadn't laughed so hard in years.

She was the life of the party last night.

A mutual friend calls.

You smile as you answer until you hear her tears.

“She's gone” she cries.

What?

“She's gone! After the party she went home and . . .

”At the funeral all you heard was: "How could this have happened? We didn't see it coming"

We've learned you can't tell by looking.

That's why it's important to talk about suicide now, before you think they need it.

Get your free guide to the talk that saves lives.

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Watch Jackie Simmons, TEDx Speaker’s, “Have the Talk to Stop Teen Suicide” talk.

"In the next 24 hours, over 3,000 American teens will attempt to take their own lives. According to the Center for Disease Control, 25% of American young adults are struggling with suicidal thoughts. When you watch Have “The Talk” to Stop Teen Suicide, you’ll enter into a world of deadly silences and bone-chilling revelations. Along the way, Have The Talk to Stop Teen Suicide delivers the clues and keys you need to break the deadly silences and prevent the guilt-nightmare that haunts parents, classmates, teachers, and friends following a suicide attempt. Have “The Talk” to Stop Teen Suicide includes the purely preventative, science-based, 4-step script for The Talk About Suicide. It’s a powerful model for communicating on a topic no one wants to talk about. Jackie believes having The Talk About Suicide just might save your child’s life. Jackie Simmons, - Jackie@TeenSuicidePreventionSociety.org – is an international speaker, the host of The Suicide Prevention Show, the co-founder of the Teen Suicide Prevention Society, and the author/compiler of the book: Make It A Great Day: The Choice Is Yours and author of The “Why Not?” Workbook: Breaking the Silence on Teen Suicide. Jackie believes that teen suicides can be prevented. This is truly a case where an ounce of prevention is worth way more than a pound of cure. "

GUEST BLOG BY ANGELA LEGH | Unraveling the Epidemic of Loneliness: A Call for Real Connection in a Digital Age

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This guest post was written by Angela Legh for the NYC Independent. Angela is an International Freelance Author, an International Bestselling Author, and Motivational Speaker.

In a recent report by the US Surgeon General, recommendations were laid out for parents and caregivers, highlighting the importance of fostering healthy social connections for young people. While these suggestions are undoubtedly valuable, they only scratch the surface of a much deeper problem.

The Challenges Presented by Social Media

The report issued by the Surgeon General fails to address the insidious nature of social media, where comparison and validation-seeking behaviors run rampant. It’s not enough to simply delay the age at which children join these platforms or monitor their screen time. We must equip them with the critical thinking skills to navigate the digital landscape responsibly and discern between meaningful connections and superficial interactions.

We must acknowledge the detrimental impact of social media and the lack of emotional literacy among today’s youth. Loneliness can stem from the craving for external validation, where one’s sense of self-worth depends on how others perceive them. This notion manifests in believing that “I am good only if you see me as good.”

If a teen’s need for validation goes unfulfilled, the teen may experience heightened feelings of inadequacy, loneliness, and even depression. This reliance on external validation from social media can perpetuate a cycle of seeking approval from others rather than fostering genuine self-confidence and inner validation. As a result, the teen may struggle to develop authentic relationships and find themselves increasingly disconnected from their true selves and those around them.

Seeking external validation can signify a disconnection from oneself that can trace its roots back to unresolved childhood wounds. Childhood trauma, whether it’s emotional neglect, physical abuse, or other forms of adversity, can leave deep emotional scars that linger into adulthood. Feelings of shame, guilt, and inadequacy stemming from these experiences can be overwhelming and difficult to face head-on, so we often bury them deep within our subconscious.

Individuals may seek validation and approval from external sources to numb the pain of these buried emotions. Alternatively, they may seek relief through numbing behaviors, such as alcohol, drugs, or self-harming behavior. Whether it’s through seeking validation from others or engaging in self-destructive behaviors, the person who chooses these coping mechanisms is carving a path toward increased emotional pain. If you notice any of these behaviors in your teens, it’s crucial to seek assistance from a professional.

The temporary relief gained from external validation only perpetuates the cycle of disconnection from oneself. True healing can only begin when we dare confront and acknowledge the buried emotions from our past. Through therapy, self-reflection, and compassionate self-care, we can gradually unearth these suppressed feelings and begin the process of healing and self-reconnection.

By facing our childhood wounds with courage and compassion, we can reclaim our sense of self-worth and break free from the cycle of seeking external validation. Doing so paves the way for genuine self-acceptance, inner peace, and authentic connection with ourselves and others.

Building Meaningful Connections Offline

Investing in solid relationships and encouraging offline, real-world interactions are crucial to combating loneliness. Volunteering to help others can forge deep, compassionate relationships as individuals come together to impact their communities. A few things can lift one’s spirit, such as volunteering to assist those in need. Whether it’s lending a hand at a local soup kitchen or participating in community service projects, the act of giving back fosters bonds based on shared values and a sense of purpose.

Similarly, joining clubs and sports teams offers opportunities to build bonding relationships. Whether it’s a book club, a hobby group, or a sports team, being part of a collective pursuit fosters a sense of belonging and camaraderie, where shared experiences and challenges deepen connections among members. Through these activities, individuals combat loneliness and cultivate a sense of belonging and interconnectedness within their communities, contributing to the collective well-being of society as a whole.

Another avenue for teens to establish offline connections is attending local events or workshops tailored to their interests, such as art exhibitions, music concerts, or educational seminars. If necessary, parents can collaborate with other parents to organize transportation and guidance for their teens. These gatherings provide opportunities for teens to mingle with others who share their interests, facilitating connections beyond their existing social circles.

Listening Compassionately

Most importantly, we must listen to the voices of our youth. Let us validate their experiences of loneliness and isolation without dismissing them as trivial or fleeting. Let us offer them the support and resources they need to navigate these turbulent waters and emerge stronger, more resilient, and truly connected to themselves and others.

Ultimately, it’s about more than the number of friends or followers we have online but the depth and authenticity of the connections we cultivate offline. The quality of life is measured by the quality of the relationships we sustain.

It’s time for parents to reflect on the impact of their own social media usage and the importance of fostering real-world connections and social interactions as a model of behavior for their children. My heart sinks when I see a parent on a playground, glued to their phone, scrolling through Instagram while the child begs for attention. At that moment, the parent misses out on genuine interaction, opting for the illusion of connection through social media. Take a moment to observe how parents in your community engage with social media. Let’s unite to fight against teenage loneliness, working toward a future where every adolescent feels acknowledged, heard, and valued for their individuality and worth.

Angela Legh is passionate about promoting emotional intelligence with her book series The Bella Santini Chronicles.While we live in a hyper-connected world, there is a paradox in how loneliness continues to plague the lives of teenagers. Despite the apparent plethora of online friends and social media followers, many adolescents are trapped in a web of isolation, yearning for genuine human connection.

Booth or Bust: Navigating the Conference Circuit as an Entrepreneur/Author

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Introduction

In the world of entrepreneurship and authorship, one of the most challenging decisions involves whether or not to participate in large scale conferences or expos. Whether it's weighing the financial investment against potential gains or considering the impact on visibility and networking, entrepreneurs and authors often find themselves at a crossroads. Amber Raymond (Social Worker, my co-author, and niece) and I have been honoured to have a booth at the American Library Association Conference (in Chicago), as well as Reading for the Love of It (In Toronto) in the past year. We made the decision to be involved in each of these, as well as future ones, by taking many factors into consideration.

Is the Investment Worth It?

Conferences come with a hefty price tag, often ranging from hundreds to thousands of dollars for attendance, booth space, accommodations, travel or workshop presenting opportunities. As Canadians, we also have to take into the account the currency exchange rate, which can increase the cost by over 40%. Each time we consider a submission, we have to carefully evaluate the return on investment (ROI) in terms of book sales, brand exposure, and networking potential. More importantly for us is our never-ending question, “How many homes or classrooms could be impacted in a positive way as a result of the connections, sales or impromptu conversations we will have?” That’s a tough one and very unpredictable.

Pros of Visibility: Amplifying Reach and Influence

Visibility is crucial for any entrepreneur or author looking to make an impact. Conferences offer a platform to showcase products, share expertise, and connect with a targeted audience. For "The Power of Thought" series and the related products we offer, being visible at conferences provides an opportunity to reach parents, educators, and influencers who can amplify the message of having a proactive lens when it comes to emotional regulation and management for children. Through our presentations, interactive booths, and networking sessions, we establish credibility and cultivate relationships that extend far beyond the event.

Cons of Taking the Risk: Navigating Uncertainty

However, the decision to participate in conferences is not without its risks. Beyond the financial investment, there's the uncertainty of ROI. Will the cost of attendance translate into significant book sales? Will the audience resonate with the message of "The Power of Thought" series? Additionally, there's the cost of time when we have to take time off of work and away from our families. Can our resources be allocated elsewhere, such as digital marketing campaigns or direct outreach to influencers?

Maximizing Impact

To mitigate the risks and optimize outcomes, let’s approach conference participation strategically. This involves thorough research to identify events aligned with the target audience and theme of "The Power of Thought" series. For us, that includes parents, educators and libraries, which has countless opportunities.

Often, conversations with fellow entrepreneurs who also believe in collaboration over competition open doors. We have joined forces with like-minded people with visions that align with ours in developing submissions as co-presenters. For example, working with Margaret Boersma not only helped us both see things from varying points of view, we dove into current research and developed our plan while pushing each other to think outside of the box. Not only does this collaboration raise the bar, it also cuts the financial cost in half.

Which conferences have served them well? Negotiating favorable terms for booth space or speaking slots, where possible, helps maximize visibility while minimizing costs. Sometimes there are options on the size of the booth and if we are also workshop presenters, that most definitely has its perks with a fully engaged audience who chose us because they have a connection. Leveraging social media and pre-conference promotion can drum up anticipation and attract attendees to the booth or presentation.

The Ripple Effect of Word of Mouth

Ultimately, the goal of conference participation extends beyond immediate book sales. It's about planting seeds for long-term success through word of mouth and endorsements. By forging genuine connections with attendees, speakers, and fellow exhibitors, entrepreneurs can spark conversations that ripple through networks, leading to recommendations, reviews, and partnerships that amplify the reach and impact of "The Power of Thought" series. From our experiences, word of mouth and the feedback we receive about the impact our books is having, liftsand empowers us.

Conclusion: Balancing Risk and Reward

The decision to participate in conferences requires careful deliberation and strategic planning. While the financial cost may seem daunting, the potential benefits in terms of visibility, networking, and word of mouth can outweigh the risks. By approaching conference participation strategically and focusing on customers as well as forging relationship with fellow entrepreneurs, we can elevate our brands, amplify our message, and ultimately, have more impact on families and educators as our books/products/resources find themselves in classrooms, libraries and homes.

Every decision shapes the narrative of success. With a clear understanding of the conference conundrum and a willingness to embrace calculated risks, entrepreneurs can navigate this terrain with confidence and conviction, reaching new heights of impact and influence. For us, the risk has most definitely been worth it! And who knows, maybe a publishing or educational company will want to make us an offer to scoop up our book series, making it more universally accessible through their global reach. Anything is possible.